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Film Review – If I had Legs I’d Kick You

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , on November 14, 2025 by Reel Review Roundup

If I Had Legs I’d Kick You (MA)

Directed by: Mary Bronstein

Starring: Rose Byrne, Conan O’Brien

Rating: 4 out of 5.

Review by: Julian Wright

Linda’s (Rose Byrne) life is utter chaos at the moment.

She is a full-time therapist, her young daughter is being fed through a tube into her stomach and needs constant medical attention, her husband Charles (Christian Slater) is working out of town, and the ceiling in their apartment has just collapsed forcing them to live in a motel.

And that’s just the tip of the iceberg.

Linda is barely keeping it together – she displays the patience of a saint around her demanding child, but at night she retreats with a bottle of wine and a joint to disassociate.

Not even her therapist/colleague (Conan O’Brien) seems equipped to help.

The first thing you might do after watching If I Had Legs…is book a holiday because it feels like you have been on this exhausting rollercoaster blur of life events with Linda.

Director Mary Bronstein keeps the level of hectic consistently high, keeping the viewer on the verge of a a panic attack.

Linda is juggling so many balls in the air, it is just a matter of time until something has to give, right?

It isn’t just that a lot of things are going on in a short period of time, we are feeling how this impacts a person and how they deal (or not deal) with it.

It is all so scarily relatable.

Rose Byrne is astounding, her frustration and desperation always just bubbling under the surface as the fatigue slowly sets in and her eyes get heavier.

Just keeping up the level of energy required to film this is impressive in itself, fortunately she is skilled enough to bring levels of nuance to the performance.

The trippy interludes around the giant hole in the ceiling are a slight detour that cements its arthouse cinema status and are not entirely necessary.

If I Had Legs I’d Kick you is highly recommended viewing.

Not recommended is watching this in a double feature with Die My Love – give the two some breathing room.

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Film Review – Die My Love

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , on November 14, 2025 by Reel Review Roundup

Die My Love (MA)

Directed by: Lynne Ramsay

Starring: Jennifer Lawrence, Robert Pattinson, Sissy Spacek

Rating: 3 out of 5.

Review by: Julian Wright

The stifling nature of domesticity and a growing mental illness sends a young mother into a nightmarish spiral in the harrowing Die My Love.

When New York creatives Grace (Jennifer Lawrence) and Jack (Robert Pattinson) move into their inherited cottage in the middle of Montana, it is supposed to be a beautiful new chapter in their lives.

Grace becomes pregnant and the couple begin raising their son – except Jack mostly works away, leaving Grace alone with the baby, no family, friends, or neighbours.

As the isolation and writer’s block takes its toll, Grace’s behaviour becomes erratic – but soon it appears that it is something much deeper that is affecting her.

Grace goes through the gamut of emotions associated with new motherhood: fatigue, low self-esteem, isolation, but it is compounded with this new lifestyle change that does not agree with her.

She is dying to express herself but doesn’t know how – it is frustrating and upsetting, for her and the viewer.

Lawrence is completely fearless and uninhibited in her portrayal of Grace, behaving child-like at certain times and then animalistic in others.

It is a performance that is fascinating to watch.

Die My Love is one of the best made films that captures exactly what it intends to and creates a mood and feeling that it intends to – the thing is it that the mood and feeling is dire.

Director Lynne Ramsay has such a strong hold and focus on the material that it is borderline documentary levels of realism.

This is a wonderful example of women telling stories about a woman’s experience, one that deserves to be told and explored, to allow visibility for those who have experienced it and educate those that have not.

And while it is definitely not a film intended to be enjoyed, it can certainly be admired, if one can endure the feeling of being different shades of frustrated, depressed and miserable for two hours.

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Film Review – The Long Walk

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , on September 10, 2025 by Reel Review Roundup

The Long Walk (MA)

Directed by: Francis Lawrence

Starring: Cooper Hoffman, David Jonsson, Judy Greer

Rating: 4.5 out of 5.

Review by: Julian Wright

A group of desperate young men walk, talk and trauma bond in this tense and moving adaptation of a Stephen King novel.

In a dystopian, post-war America, the only hope for wealth young men have is to enter into an annual walking competition.

Sounds simple enough, but there is no set finish line – it is a walk cross-country to the death.

The men must maintain a certain speed and anyone who slows down or cops three warnings is shot on the spot.

Those left keep walking until there is one man standing.

Raymond Garraty (Cooper Hoffman) signs up and is dropped off at the starting point by his single mum Ginnie (Judy Greer).

He is immediately drawn to fellow competitor Peter McVries (David Jonsson) and the two get along like a house on fire, and quickly form a close camaraderie with a handful of other competitors.

Bonds form and motivations are revealed, which makes it even more devastating when they begin to meet their fate one buy one.

Who knew walking and talking could be so intense?

The Long Walk puts you through the gamut of emotions as we witness these likable characters trauma bond and develop deep connections with their competitors while fighting off the inevitable.

There are moments that are amusing, thought-provoking and downright shocking, and you will find yourself tearing up at least twice.

What is nice about this story is that the majority of these characters do not start out antagonistic despite being in competition with each other – they enter into this scenario with humility – an important tactic to ensure they are endearing to the audience.

This is one of the best depictions of male bonding on film with these young men allowed to be seen as sensitive and vulnerable.

Director Francis Lawrence has assembled a terrific cast of mostly unknowns – there is not a single weak link among them.

And in his dedication to realism, his adaptation doesn’t shy away from certain realities and how the men handle them – particularly bathroom breaks, which adds to the unflinching experience.

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Film Review – Jurassic World Rebirth

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , , , on July 2, 2025 by Reel Review Roundup

Jurassic World Rebirth (M)

Directed by: Gareth Evans

Starring: Scarlett Johansson, Jonathan Bailey

Rating: 3.5 out of 5.

Review by: Julian Wright

It has been five years since the events of Jurassic World: Dominion – the dinos are dying out and people are bored of them anyway.

Surprise, surprise – 65-million-year-old species find it difficult to thrive in Earth’s current climates and eco-systems.

There are, however, species that have survived on a collection of islands near the equator (much closer to the climate they experienced back in the day), an area that is off-limits to humans.

But dino DNA could be a major key to medical breakthroughs that can save millions of human lives. Cha-ching!

So pharmaceutical representative Martin Kreb (Rupert Friend) dangles mega bucks to recruit covert ops specialist Zora (Scarlett Johansson) – plus her trusty crew with their own particular set of skills – and palaeontologist Dr. Henry Loomis (Jonathan Bailey) to gather DNA from the three biggest dinos.

Thrown in for extra measure and run-time, is the family on a yachting holiday in dangerous waters who end up on the same deserted island as the DNA collectors.

Unfortunately, that island is home to an abandoned lab where a hybrid mega-dino was created – and escaped.

After an overblown trilogy of World films featuring Chris Pratt and a little clone girl (what were they thinking?), the series takes it back to basics and the Spielbergian tone of the Parks films.

Despite the plot set-up and multiple characters, this is a fairly straight forward action adventure with the usual moral food for thought mixed in.

Rebirth is not a bad effort as a stand-alone instalment, setting up characters that are unrelated to the previous stories, allowing a clean slate, fresh start and new canvas.

Unfortunately, the characters and actors are mostly charmless – Johansson is peculiarly low-key, her “do less” approach would be dull even in a thoughtful drama, let alone a run-for-your-life action/thriller.

Ditto for the immensely talented Mahershala Ali as her team leader, who, despite given a heroic arc, barely stands out among the action and carnage.

But we are here for the dinos, and dinos we get.

Director Gareth Evans (who visually references his own 2014 Godzilla film) crafts some of the series’ hairiest, most thrilling white-knuckle dino sequences (water raft vs T-Rex and abseiling vs Pterodactyl).

Even though Evans has come in at the seventh film, he still manages to excite and play with our nerves with these fascinating but deadly animals.

On the scale of Jurassic films, Rebirth sits slightly closer to the Parks than the previous Worlds – it is a rollicking time passer though unlikely to be revered like Spielberg’s classic.

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Film Review – F1

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , on June 25, 2025 by Reel Review Roundup

F1 (M)

Directed by: Joseph Kosinski

Starring: Brad Pitt, Jarvier Bardem

Rating: 4.5 out of 5.

Review by: Julian Wright

“Someone call the 1990s…” a commentator says during a thrilling racing montage – an appropriate line in this loving throwback to action films of the era that had the formula down to a T.

Sonny Hayes (Brad Pitt) is a retired F1 race car driver whose heyday is long in the past (by about 30 years).

These days he lives out of a van and gambles in his spare time – of which he has plenty.

When his old mate/former F1 competitor Ruben Cervantes (Javier Bardem) is about to lose $350 million on his team of racers, he recruits Sonny to help get them a win.

With nothing to lose, Sonny joins the team, but there is immediate tension between the has-been and young hotshot Joshua Pearce (Damson Idris), and the two teammates clash over how to claim the top spot.

Meanwhile, sparks fly between Sonny and the team’s technical director Kat (Kerry Condon), who tries her best, despite his charms, to keep things professional (spoiler alert – she loses).

This Ehren Kruger scripted, Joseph Kosinski directed, and Jerry Bruckheimer produced film takes all the best and most entertaining elements of a 90s action film and repurposes them for a new audience.

With just enough plot and character outlines to hook us in, it is fuelled purely by star appeal (Pitt has never oozed more charisma), bouts of bristling banter and thrilling action sequences.

It walks that fine line of the perfect amount of plot, character development and story complications so that there is just enough substance to keep us interested, but not too much that we get bogged down and distracted from the action.

If it wasn’t for the technical advances in filmmaking, one could have easily mistaken this for a 90s video shop staple.

Kosinski gets the audience out on the track in innovative new ways, mounting the camera on the cars, and spinning them 180 degrees for a dynamic point of view among the action.

And jaw-droppingly, none of these high-stakes races appear CGI assisted.

Don’t know the first thing about F1 racing? Or any car racing in general?

No problem – F1 takes care to ensure audience members that don’t even know the difference between an automatic and a manual can still follow along, even when it pops into fourth gear.

Everything clicks in to place to deliver a hugely entertaining popcorn film in the best way.

This is the quintessential crowd-pleaser.

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Film Review – A Minecraft Movie

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , on April 4, 2025 by Reel Review Roundup

A Minecraft Movie (PG)

Directed by: Jared Hess

Starring: Jason Momoa, Jack Black, Jennifer Coolidge

Rating: 3.5 out of 5.

Review by: Julian Wright

Hollywood hunk Jason Momoa and funny-man Jack Black team up for a big screen adaptation of a video game – with pleasantly surprising results.

When bored office worker Steve (Jack Black) finds a magical glowing blue cube that opens a portal to another world, he steps in and starts exploring.

He falls in love with the endless imagination and creativity that this cubic world offers (everyhting from buildings to people and nature have a block-like appearance), closes the portal with the cube hidden under his bed (he admits, a lousy hiding spot) and never returns home.

Years later and in his hometown, the washed-up video arcade competition champion Garrett (Jason Momoa), siblings Henry (Sebastian Hansen) and Natalie (Emma Myers) and quirky real estate agent Dawn (Danielle Brooks) find the cube and enter this other world.

Together, they must navigate the world, their new-found capabilities, battle local villain Malgosha (voiced by Rachel House) and get back home.

There are definite Jumanji vibes about A Minecraft Movie, and the internal logic of the cubic world was unclear – at one point, Natalie utters “This place makes no sense” and honestly, she wasn’t wrong.

But when the laughs are so consistent, the cast is engaging and the action a pleasant distraction, it is easy to overlook the convolutions.

Momoa and Black bring a lot of charm to their block-head roles, with Momoa in particular thriving in his “The Rock does comedy” era.

Jennifer Coolidge is utterly delightful, delivering some of the biggest laughs (if you are a fan of her style of comedy, and it seems lately, many of us are), in a completely superfluous B-plot that could be easily removed and have no impact on the film.

The film zips along at a great pace so to avoid boring young ones and game fans – the frenetic action pausing only on occasion to reiterate that creativity is good and should be encouraged, nurtured and supported (positive message – check).

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Film Review – Better Man

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , on December 30, 2024 by Reel Review Roundup

Better Man (MA)

Directed by: Michael Gracey

Starring: Robbie Williams, Jonno Davies, Steve Pemberton

Rating: 4 out of 5.

Review by: Julian Wright

Cheeky British popstar Robbie Williams’ rags to riches life is adapted to the big screen with some bold choices – but one in particular sets this biopic aside from all the others.

Better Man charts Williams’ life from humble, working class beginnings and not fitting in with the other lads on the soccer field, to being the youngest member of pop band Take That, his solo career and meteoric rise in popularity.

And his ultimate fall and fame-related struggles.

A few of the dramatic beats and developments are standard popstar biopic fare (drug addiction, self destructive behaviour, strained relationships etc) but this has been given the mega-budget treatment and is bursting with energy and style.

There are major musical sequences that are truly dazzling, giving this film a grander scale than what we usually see in this sub-genre, which are usually far more grounded and contained.

The biggest swing Better Man takes is having Williams represented as a CGI chimpanzee, for metaphoric purposes, throughout the entire film.

It is a bold and unusual choice that may not sit well with everyone, but it is certainly a fresh way to deliver the story when other aspects very familiar.

The film’s greatest achievement is capturing and maintaining Williams endearingly cheeky personality and still making him someone to root for even when he begins to spiral.

Williams personality shines through and is a constant reminder why people fell in love with him in the first place, and why his redemption story deserves our attention.

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Film Review – Conclave

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , on December 23, 2024 by Reel Review Roundup

Conclave (MA)

Directed by: Edward Berger

Starring: Ralph Fiennes, Stanley Tucci, John Lithgow

Rating: 4 out of 5.

Review by: Julian Wright

Conclave pulls back the curtain on one of the biggest, but most secretive, processes in history – finding a new Pope.

When the Pope dies in his bed, the wheels are put immediately in motion to find his replacement.

Cardinal Lawrence (Ralph Fiennes) is tasked with leading the process, with candidates coming from all over the world in hopes to take the coveted spot.

There are the obvious front-runners, but as the competition heats up and the votes start rolling in, motivations are questioned, policies are feared and past indiscretions are revealed.

Conclave is a riveting drama that is handled like a slow-burn thriller, as layers are pulled away on the key characters, which raise suspicions.

Fiennes delivers a beautifully controlled performance, leading us through this fascinating, yet scandal-filled process, each twist testing the reluctant Cardinal.

Speaking of twists, the wallop delivered at the end is one for the ages, but more than simply there for shock value, it forces you to re-assess everything that has come before it and look at it through another perspective.

Just when you think you have a handle on what Conclave has to say about religion and progressiveness, the final twist brings with it a much more evocative and thought-provoking situation.

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Film Review – Paddington in Peru

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , on December 23, 2024 by Reel Review Roundup

Paddington in Peru (G)

Directed by: Dougal Wilson

Starring: Ben Wishaw, Emily Mortimer, Olivia Colman

Rating: 3 out of 5.

Review by: Julian Wright

The Marmalade-loving bear discovers his roots in an overseas adventure, but the hijinks don’t quite hit the heights of the previous two films.

When Paddington receives a letter from his Aunty Lucy, he and the Brown family decide to visit her at the Home for Retired Bears in Peru.

When they arrive, they discover she has actually disappeared, and must track her down through the Amazon jungle in a greater adventure than they planned.

Along the way, they meet a collection of quirky characters including Reverend Mother (a scene-stealing Olivia Colman) and treasure hunter Hunter Cabot (Antonio Banderas), who may or may not be trusty allies.

It is always a joy to see the gentle and sweet Paddington on the big screen, again, perfectly voiced by Ben Wishaw. He is so beautifully realised by the creative team and his presence is always so heartwarming.

Unfortunately, his latest adventure is lacking.

The absence of writer/director Paul King is noticeable – his films tackled themes like immigration which gave them weight.

Here, Dougal Wilson has stepped into the director’s chair working with a story about family and discovering your roots, which just doesn’t have the same urgency or edge.

The pacing this time around is also skewed – there are some action packed sequences, but they are bridged with long, slow stretches that could test the patience of youngsters.

Come for Paddington but stay for Colman, who is the brightest spark in a cast of actors struggling to make their mark (the Brown children are always there, but don’t actually do much.)

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Film Review – Wicked (Part 1)

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , on November 20, 2024 by Reel Review Roundup

Wicked (Part 1) (PG)

Directed by: Jon M. Chu

Starring: Cynthia Erivo, Ariana Grande, Jonathan Bailey

Rating: 4.5 out of 5.

Review by: Julian Wright

In 1939’s The Wizard of Oz, Glinda and the Wicked Witch only had a brief interaction in Munchkinland, but Wicked, first a novel, then beloved Broadway musical, now big-screen adaptation, poses an intricate backstory.

What if these two were once friends and the Wicked Witch wasn’t wicked at all – or at least, didn’t start out that way?

Cynthia Arivo dons the green makeup as Elphaba and Ariana Grande slips into the pink outfits as Glinda for the highly anticipated latest version of this bit of Oz history.

Elphaba was born with green skin, making her a familial and societal outcast, but she has magic powers brewing that only unleash when she is angry.

When she accompanies her sister Nessarose (Marissa Bode) to Shiz University, a school for spell-casting, she unintentionally demonstrates her unbridled powers and is immediately taken under the wing of headmistress Madame Morrible (Michelle Yeoh).

Elphaba is forced to room with well-meaning prima donna with diva tendencies, Glinda, and the two immediately clash before realising a bond.

But their friendship is soon tested over the charming Fiyero (Jonathan Bailey) and Elphaba’s activist tendencies.

Wicked is much more than fan service for The Wizard of Oz fans with a handful of easter eggs (though many familiar elements are cleverly woven throughout, like the poppies); it explores a complex and richly textured friendship between two women dealing with social injustices.

Plus, some catchy tunes.

There are hints of Clueless, Legally Blonde, Mean Girls, Harry Potter and Carrie and yet Wicked avoids coming off as lazy duplication of each, due to its unwavering focus on the nuances of its own characters, their relationships and its world-building.

Wicked builds on the world established in The Wizard of Oz, revisiting established locations (now more spectacular than before with the 2024 makeover treatment) and bringing us to new locations, which still feel like they are from the Land of Oz we have come to know and love.

(One slight quibble is the high speed train that Glinda rides – yet years later, doesn’t suggest this mode of transportation to Dorothy for her journey to see the Wizard? Seems a bit rude.)

One of the most impressive things about Wicked are the sets. Of course, there are CGI enhancements, but the use of physical, man-made buildings, that are so beautifully and intricately designed, gives Wicked a sense of realism amid the fantasy, which is a key element in how engaging it is.

This choice really sets Wicked aside from the other blockbusters where the actors have clearly been standing on an empty sound stage with the backdrop added in later.

Wicked is definitely Arivo’s movie – the story is about her character – and she is incredible, being able to pull off all the complex emotions her character experiences and provide her amazing vocals.

But the biggest pleasant surprise is Ariana Grande, who delivers one of this year’s finest comedic performances, from her amusing line deliveries to her spoiled little girl quips and pouts – all while still remaining likeable.

There is always an innocence to her selfish and self-centred actions.

Here, Ariana displays on-screen charisma that Reese Witherspoon and Sandra Bullock carved entire careers out of. Watch this space.

Wicked is a grand old time that values story and character as much as spectacle and builds to a powerful conclusion before hitting us with that final message “To be continued…”

Part 2 is already my most anticipated movie of 2025.

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